The science behind self-care

 Over the last few years, the term "self-care" has become a sort of buzzword to signify "treating yourself" or to justify a bad decision. You got chewed out by your boss today at work and now you feel tempted to ditch your chores and opt for ice cream and a movie night instead. You've been feeling down and decide to buy those new shoes you've been wanting instead of putting your paycheck into your savings. In both these instances, these actions could be justified by telling yourself "This is self-care. I deserve this!", and you're not entirely wrong. Taking time to relax and enjoy doing nothing after a draining day is important and spending a little money on something that makes you feel happy is something you deserve. But self-care isn't just doing what you want with the justification that it makes you feel good. With that mindset, self-care can very quickly turn into a habit of avoidance or temporary relief. To avoid this, it's important to truly understand what self-care really means, and what it is intended to do.

Self-care can and has been defined in many ways, but a favorite of mine is from a study published in BMC Palliative Care in April 2018 that describes self-care as "the self-initiated behavior that people choose to incorporate to promote good health and general well-being." All people will by nature partake in actions that promote their health or happiness to some extent. If you feel hungry, you'll eat something. If you feel dirty, you'll take a shower. What this definition emphasizes, though, is the choice behind our actions. Regular, everyday actions can be elevated to acts of self-care when an individual chooses to behave differently out of love for themselves or a desire to love themself. Self-care should be thought of not as a treat to feel guilty about or a reward only deserved after an especially bad day, but as an active decision to treat yourself better because you love yourself and are deserving of more.

With this definition in mind, self-care can be so much more than a tub of ice cream and a Harry Potter marathon (though it can be that too!). Now it can be something as simple as making yourself dinner at home instead of buying takeout or taking the time to dress in a way that makes you feel confident and attractive, not just throwing something on for convenience or comfort. These seemingly small actions are the choices that can make a person feel more relaxed, in control, attractive, powerful, or worthy, which can ignite positive change in all aspects of your personal and professional life.

The importance of self-care is at a record high during these unprecedented times caused by the COVID-19 pandemic. Eating healthy, getting enough sleep, being active, and simply being kind to yourself are some of the basic acts of self-care psychologists emphasize in an article from the American Psychological Association. These may seem obvious to most, but the act of self-care is less in eating healthy and more in the choice to change your eating habits out of a desire to treat your body with the love it deserves. This has been one of the biggest focuses of my self-care journey. I would often neglect a morning meal and didn't realize how that would negatively affect my entire day. To make it more of a treat and a hobby, I like to take photos of my meals and have fun with the presentation, like the ones I've included below!

As the pandemic continues to alter our everyday lives, I hope that we can all learn to take moments of self-care throughout our day: an extra five minutes to meditate or journal, waking up 20 minutes earlier in order to cook breakfast at home, or taking 30 seconds to say three things we love about ourselves when we look in the mirror each morning. It is these small acts of kindness to ourselves that can help make dark days a little more manageable.